"Hedgehogs. Why can't they just share the hedge?" Dan Antopolski
"Life is what was happening while you were making other plans." -John Lennon
"I wish I had some kind of affirmative message to leave you with. I don’t. Would you take two negative messages?" Woody Allen
In their book "unSpun," Brooks Jackson and Kathleen Hall Jamieson (respectively, FactCheck.org’s and the Annenberg Public Policy Center’s directors) discuss what they call "the literally true falsehood."
"... just being the way things go, another example of entropy, tugging everything towards the middle and then below, without anyone noticing, a quiet inexplicable reverse engineering of lowered expectations." Brent Cox
"A dying man needs to die, as a sleepy man needs to sleep, and there comes a time when it is wrong, as well as useless, to resist." Stewart Alsop
"A government big enough to give you everything you need is big enough to take away everything you have." Gerald Ford
"Computers will never need more than 640K of RAM". Bill Gates
"Garth, who I originally thought was all hat and no cattle" Steve Tuttle
"Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. You know you're going to get it, but it's going to be rough." - Adam Hills
"If it weren’t for Philo T Farnsworth, inventor of the television, we’d still be eating frozen radio dinners."Johnny Carson
"If you have to ask what a film symbolizes, it doesn't." Roger Ebert
"It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma..." Winston Churchill
"It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends upon his not understanding it!" Upton Sinclair
"Television is a medium. It is neither rare nor well done." — Bill Moyers
"The particular has no language." T.S. Eliot
"This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England" From Richard II, Act 2 (Shakespeare)
"When we understand that slide we'll have won the war." General McChrystal, leader of NATO forces in Afghanistan
"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." Sherlock Holmes
..."every system is perfectly designed to get the results that it gets"...Paul Batalden
"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." Abraham Lincoln
"Never let a serious crisis go to waste." - White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel.
"the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard." H. L. Mencken
"Training less to save money is like stopping the clock to save time." John Tobin of Siemens Corporation
Alistair McGowan - "I've just split up from my girlfriend, which is a shame, because it was a long-standing arrangement. Perhaps if we'd sat down a bit more..."
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. Albert Einstein
Client/server computing is a little like teenage sex--everyone talks about it, few actually do it, and even fewer do it right. Publication: Credit Union Executive, Date: Friday, January 1 1993
Dan Antopolski - "I've been reading the news about there being a civil war in Madagascar. Well, I've seen it six times and there isn't."
do the inevitable along the way to the outrageous
Dom Helder Camara, archbishop of Recife, "When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why the poor have no food, they call me a communist."
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. Aldous Huxley
George Lucas told her Princess Leia couldn't wear a bra because "there is no underwear in space."
Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
If you can't eat it or play with it,
Just pee on it and walk away.
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. Galileo Galilei
I don't know! I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again! Bart Simpson
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. Will Rogers
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones. Albert Einstein
If a bank is too big to fail, it’s way too big to exist. If an oil well is too far beneath the sea to be plugged when something goes wrong, it’s too deep to be drilled in the first place. Bob Herbert
Jack Whitehall - "I'm sure wherever my dad is; he's looking down on us. He's not dead, just very condescending."
John M. Mitchell, the U.S. Attorney General from 1969-1972, once said, "The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists and other subversives. We intend to clean them out, even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country."
Law of Unintended Consequences "paramount concern with the foreseen immediate consequences excludes the consideration of further or other consequences"
sociologist Robert K. Merton
Life's Little Instructions "Never stand when you can sit. Never sit or stand when you can dance."
Maybe this world is another planet's hell. Aldous Huxley
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
Albert Einstein
Political strategist James Carville, "If your opponent is drowning, throw the son of a bitch an anvil."
Processing is not solving. If a supposed solution uses automation to get through more of your customer input faster while fixing fewer problems, it's not a solution, it's a failure. Ben Popken
Science has proof without any certainty. Creationists have certainty without any proof. (Ashley Montague)
Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind. Albert Einstein
Sic transit gloria mundi "Thus passes the glory of the world".
Swimming pools in the United States contain enough water to cover the city of San Francisco with a layer of water about 7 feet deep. Another major quake could also produce the same result.
That all men are equal is a proposition which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given his assent. Aldous Huxley
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein
The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim high and falling short, but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark~ Michelangelo Buonarroti 1475-1564, Renaissance Painter and Sculptor
There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know. Donald Rumsfeld
There is a world dimensional for those untwisted by the love of things irreconcilable. --Hart Crane
Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock. --Ben Hecht
Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare. Japanese Proverb
We Americans live in a nation where the medical care is second to none; unless you count maybe 25 0r 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it.
~~~Dave Berry
When you don't have any money, the problem is food. When you have money, it's sex. When you have both it's health. J. P. Donleavy